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May
03

6,969 Positions You Need to Know: Everything Your Partner Wants

The title of this article is basically poking fun at Cosmopolitan Magazine and its way of letting us all in on the secrets that apparently nobody knows about that we all should.  So really we are going to talk about a couple positions…the basics!  There are four different “main” positions, of which basically all others are variations:

  • Rear Entry: the insertive partner enters the receptive partner from behind.
  • Missionary: also known as insertive partner on top, the insertive partner enters from above the receptive partner.
  • Side Entry: partners lie side by side, either facing away or towards each other or even in a “+” shape.
  • Receptive Partner on Top: the receptive partner “rides” the insertive partner by sitting on top of or straddling the phallus.

Every single other position is really just a variation of one of those.

So when Cosmo says that they know all 2,385,738 moves to make you squeal with pleasure, think about the four basic positions and how each one of their positions is just a variation.  This empowers you to get thinking creatively! There are tons of ways that you can “bump pretties” so just get creative.  First look at each of the four basic positions, next think about where you could do it, and finally how you can make it better and more perfect for you!  If you love silk, then you could do it on silk!  Making the best positions happen is really about getting creative and working things you love into the mix: start with a basic position, throw an arm here and a leg over there, and before you know it you found yourself a position that you have never heard of, that gets you off like no other, and that is completely yours!

Now, when you are getting ready for finals and you need a study break, think about 10 different positions that you could do.  You can make them up; you don’t need help from a magazine, you got into the University of Wisconsin–Madison after all!

May
02

Condom Use Errors

The vast majority of available literature on condom failures has focused on inconsistent condom use, ignoring the phenomenon of incorrect condom use.  Researchers tend to treat consistent condom users as consistently correct condom users, which is not necessarily the case.  Bleaker yet, people with a history of condom failure tend to become distrustful of condom efficacy, misattributing their own incorrect use of the product to the company that made the condom and deterring future use.

However, the data is quite consistent that the vast majority of condom failures are due to human error and not the manufacturing of the condom itself.  When used consistently and correctly, male latex condoms are at least 98% effective in preventing the transmission of fluid-spread sexually transmitted infections such as HIV.  Below is a list of the most common condom use errors.

  • Neglecting to check for an air bubble: 83% of the time
  • Neglecting to check the expiration date on the packaging: 71% of the time
  • Applying the condom after commencement of intercourse: 25-50% of the time
  • Putting the condom on the wrong way: 10%-30% of the time
  • Applying an inadequate amount or no lubrication: 25%  of the time
  • Not pinching the tip: 42-75% of the time
  • Not leaving excess space in the tip of the condom:  24-46% of the time
  • Not rolling the condom all the way down to the base of the shaft: 15% of the time
  • Removing the condom before finishing intercourse: 15% time
  • Not holding on the base of the condom when withdrawing to prevent slippage or spillage: 27-31% of the time
  • Other nuanced errors included unrolling the condom all the way before applying to the penis and re-using the condom: 7% of the time

[Note: “Percent of the time” refers to the collective sample pool of all condom uses by all participants in the included studies, not condom mistakes per participant.]

Most studies found that increased experience with using condoms did not improve competency.  If a person learns to apply condoms incorrectly, they are not likely to unlearn their method.  Others found that self-reported lack of information was a contributing factor to incorrect condom use.  The CDC reported that 37% of health teachers in the United States are “inadequate” in teaching proper condom application and use.  Misinformation and rumors are another source.   A review of the National Longitudinal Study of Adolescent Health found that a third of youth believe that they should not leave space in the tip of the condom and Vaseline is a recommended lubrication; one-fifth incorrectly believe that lambskin condoms are more effective in preventing the transmission of HIV than latex condoms.

One major gap in the literature is the minimal acknowledgement of the social and emotional factors of incorrect condom use.  “Heat of the moment” syndrome may take precedent over lack of education or information.  The literature also ignores that demonstrated condom ability in the laboratory—under lights, cameras, and supervision—may present differently than in the bedroom.

Please contact sexoutloud@gmail.com if you are interested in the bibliography for this piece.

Apr
27

Sexual Violence and HIV Transmission in the Democratic Republic of the Congo

Sexual violence in the Democratic Republic of the Congo (DRC) is one of the most pervasive and devastating issues facing the country today. Decades of fighting over the First and Second Congo War have destroyed government and healthcare infrastructure, creating some of the world health and development indicators in the world. The Congo Wars are sometimes referred to “Africa’s World War” because they involved so many neighboring countries, and because studies have placed the death toll around 5.4 million, making it the deadliest conflict since World War ll.

In 2007, UN-Secretary-General for Humanitarian Affairs John Holmes called raped in the DRC the “worst in the world” in comparison to other states of comparable development levels. In 2010, the U.N.’s special representative on sexual violence in conflict Margot Wallstrom called the DRC the “rape capital of the world.” The U.N. estimates that 200,000 women and girls have been assaulted in the past 12 years, with more than 18,000 cases reported between January and September 2008 alone. Medical experts estimate that thousands more cases are going unreported. Intense stigma associated with being a rape survivor, stressed and inadequate healthcare infrastructure, and inadequate justice and accountability systems make it difficult for women to report instances of sexual abuse.

The majority of these rapes are not occurring randomly, but rather they are systematic attacks on women and girls in a conflict which increasingly targets civilians. An April 2010 report by the Harvard Humanitarian Initiative revealed that 60 percent of rape victims in South Kivu were gang raped by armed militias. Settings for these rapes include forced incest, gang rape, rape in public, rape with foreign objects, and urogenital mutilation. Female rape victims are at a high risk of contracting HIV because tearing, cuts and bruising within the vulva and vagina facilitate the transmission of the virus, according to Doctors Without Borders. The fear of HIV increases stigmatization of rape victims within their communities.

Stigmatization is one of the key elements to understanding the patterns of social isolation and rejection after a victim is raped. In a report by the Harvard Humanitarian Initiative and the Open Society Institute, researchers found that stigmatization after rape was an overarching pattern in communities. Women with children born of rape, women who have been gang raped, women with fistula as a consequence of rape, and women testing positive for HIV are especially vulnerable to social isolation. The Harvard Humanitarian Initiative and The Open Society Institute found that 1 in 3 women reported being rejected by their husbands and 1 in 15 reported being rejected by their communities.

After they are raped, women are perceived to be “contaminated” by their attackers, and many times they are turned out by their husbands and by their communities. This is directly correlated to fears of HIV and STI transmission.

Due to inadequate healthcare infrastructure, thousands of victims are unable to seek treatment or testing for HIV and STIs. Treatment at this time is more essential than ever, due to the fact that beyond needing medical attention, many women rejected by their husbands have no where else to turn.

It is important we acknowledge the significant impact conflict and systematic rape has on the lives of thousands of women and men, as this understanding will only broaden our ability to be able to positively affect the global discourse surrounding HIV AIDS transmission.

Please Note: Although this article primarily concerns women, both men and women have been the targets of rape in DRC. I focus on female victims in this article because the rape of women occurs proportionally at a much higher rate, and because much of the research on social isolation and sexual violence treatment centers focuses on female victims. Understanding how rape impacts male victims is one of the understudied aspects of the DRC conflicts.

Suggestions for further reading:

“Characterizing Sexual Violence in the Democratic Republic of the Congo.” Harvard Humanitarian Initiative. Final Report for the Open Society Institute. August 2009. Accessed 12/6/2011. <http://hhi.harvard.edu/programs-and-research/program-on-humanitarian-effectiveness/54-democratic-republic-of-congo>.

Mawathe, Anne. “Haunted by Congo rape dilemma.” BBC News – Africa. Mary 15, 2010. <http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/8677637.stm>.

MONUSCO, the U.N. Stabilization Organization in the Democratic Republic of the Congo. <http://monusco.unmissions.org/Default.aspx?tabid=4072>.

“Sexual Violence.” Doctors Without Borders. <http://www.doctorswithoutborders.org/news/issue.cfm?id=3466>.

“UN official calls DR Congo ‘rape capital of the world’ ”. BBC News – Africa. April 28, 2010. <http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/8650112.stm>.

Apr
25

Behind the Scenes at SOL: Penis Piñata, Gnomes, and Thousands of Condoms

Thanks to UW students, programs and events have become very popular around campus, but this makes our office very, very jealous! A wacky combination of different personalities, vibrant colors, and sweet decorations make a day at the SOL office just as fun as our programming.

For starters, our staff is extensively trained and competent in talking about sex, and that’s why we do it (the talking) so much! From the time the office opens in the afternoon to the time the last student leaves, sex is always brought up in some capacity. The office is a very safe space to talk about sex tips, health advice, resources, and pretty much anything you’d like! No question is off limits!

Aside from all the fun we have finding exciting ways to talk about sexual health, there’s a lot of serious business that happens behind SOL’s doors. Since we’re most well-known for giving out free condoms, some might think we make it rain with condoms back at the office. The truth is, the thousands of condoms that we distribute for all students to enjoy are meticulously counted, sorted, and bagged by staff and volunteers. Every condom counts—literally.

On an average day, SOL staff sends about a dozen emails about sexual health to our fellow sex educators, students, and community organizations. We also maintain a Facebook, Meebo, Twitter, and website to fulfill UW’s sexual health needs! We pretty much dominate the social media world. If Google+ was cool, we’d probably have one of those, too.

More than anything, we keep our office sexxxy! Brightly colored books, T-shirts and paper-mache body parts give the SOL office an amazing flair. Not to mention the outrageous amounts of gnomes from our old “Gnome means Gnome” campaign, which give the place an amazing feng shui.

What probably makes the SOL office seem so good-looking is the immense amount of time we allot to organizing. There are the tons of labels for absolutely everything! Every drawer, box, container, and shelf has its own label to ensure the office stays fresh and clean.

Probably the best kept secret at SOL office that students might not realize is how much we love each other. SOL staff spends so much time learning together and growing our passion for comprehensive sex education that it shines through in all aspects of our organization! Next time you’re in the SAC, don’t forget to stop by the office to visit us; it may in fact make your day!

Really wanna know what it’s like at the SOL office? Check out Sex Out Loud in Sh*t Sex Out Loud Says:

Apr
21

Fun Alternative Uses for Insertive Condoms

You don’t have to have a penis to include insertive (male) condoms in your fun and games! For your reading pleasure, here are several sexy and fun alternative uses for condoms!

Quick Sex Toy Clean-up!
First of all, condoms aren’t just useful with fleshy bits! Slipping a condom on a sex toy like a dildo or vibe for solo sex can make aftercare of your sex toys a lot easier and faster. Because seriously, who wants to get up in the middle of a glorious post-orgasmic afterglow to trot down the hall to the sink? Roll the condom on before you get going, then throw in the trash for quick-and-easy clean-up. It’s like using aluminum foil in the kitchen to avoid dishes, but sexier!

For partnered use of sex toys, condoms are also important barriers for preventing swapping of fluids to limit STI transmission risks. Always remember to use a new condom for every partner and every hole!

Another important consideration with sex toys is potentially toxic ingredients including phthalates that are often used in a variety of plastics and soft jelly toys. Ever notice an overwhelming plastic-y smell when you first unwrap a new toy? If it smells toxic, it could very well be. Although phthalate-free toys are available, they tend to be more expensive, and throwing out all your old ones to buy brand-new can be a daunting for a college student on a limited budget. Instead, slip a condom on it to prevent exposing yourself and your most sensitive parts!

Make Your Own Sex Dam!
Major chain drug stores usually don’t care oral barriers. (Reminder: Sex Out Loud stocks free sex dams, as well as 20+ different types of condoms in our office!) But, in a few minutes, any type of insertive condom can become a DIY-sex dam! Simply unroll, snip off the tip, then carefully cut long-ways. Stretch over your partner’s vulva, butthole, or balls for safe oral fun.

For a more advanced arts & crafts project, you could use some condoms to make party lights?

Stand in for Latex Gloves!
In a pinch, a condom can be stretched over the hand as a stand-in for latex or nitrile gloves if you don’t have any, to protect your partner from inadvertent injury during finger fucking or fisting, particularly from fingernails. Remember that although male condoms are marketed in different “sizes,” all condoms are capable of stretching VERY far!

As a storage device for ALL sorts of things that don’t have anything to do with drug trafficking…
For anything from small, sensitive electronic equipment like stage microphones, to matches and smokes, to a travel-case for a toothbrush, non-lube condoms can work great to protect from moisture, sand and dirt. Text msgers take note: The touch-screen on a smartphone still works inside a condom, but now waterproof.

Before you use a condom, always (1) check the expiration date (2) squeeze the package gently to make sure the air bubble is intact (3) make sure your hands are clean! Also, make sure you have your partner’s consent.

Remember that using barriers is a way to minimize, not totally eliminate the risk of STD transmission and it’s a good practice to get tested regularly. As a UW student, you can get tested for free at UHS!

Happy sexcapades!

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