Let’s face it folks, every now and then things happen that we just aren’t expecting to ever happen. Sometimes we meet someone who isn’t obsessed with J-Law, sometimes we find a hard gnarly thing when we bite into our burgers, sometimes Leonardo DiCaprio doesn’t win the Oscar (oh wait we were all expecting that one), and sometimes…we queef.
To get the giggles out of our systems, let’s just throw the word out there a few times. QUEEF QUEEF QUEEF. Ok sweet, so let’s start with the basics, what is a queef? Well, when inserting an object into a vagina, the rush of air that comes along with the insertion is forced to exit. We’ve been learning it in science class since high school, matter cannot be destroyed. The air that goes into the vagina cannot just disappear, and so it comes out, often resulting in an audible squeak commonly referred to as a “vaginal fart” or a queef. This is something dreaded by many people with vaginas, but honestly it’s something that you just have to roll with, because at some point it could happen to any vagina.
But, let’s be real, we aren’t always super comfy and confident during sex, it’s a vulnerable time, so let’s go over a few ways that we can recover from what can initially seem as something embarrassing.
1. Add some external noise. So we’ve already established that queefs can be loud. Well, what do you do when you have a pimple? You cover it up. The same can go for a queef. By turning on a sexy time playlist, popping in a movie, or even playing some soothing rainforest sounds in the background of our sexual encounter, the noise produced by a queef can be completely hidden. Or, if you don’t have access to any of those things, letting out a passionate moan or throwing out some dirty talk can also distract from the queef’s roar.
2. Switch up the position. Ok, we’ve tried adding some music to remedy the situation, but maybe that is really cramping our style; we want to have sex in silence and hear only the gasping breaths of our partner but don’t want to worry about a queef sliding out. Well, maybe it’s time to switch up the sex position. Rear entry, commonly referred to as “Doggy Style”, can be totally awesome for tons of reasons (request our Pleasure II program to learn more!), but it also will make you more prone to queefing. It allows for a much deeper and quicker penetration, pushing more air into the vagina, and thus more opportunities for queefs. Instead, try switching up the position to missionary, side entry, or receptive partner on top to alleviate the issue.
3. Own it. At the end of the day, the queef is something that cannot always be helped. That said, it does not have to be something to be embarrassed about. If you find yourself in a situation where you are having the hottest sex of your life and a queef rears its ugly head during it, keep on going and laugh it off. If you don’t let it bother you, odds are it won’t bother the person you are with. You just gotta brush the dirt off your shoulders and let the fun continue.